Saturday, October 29, 2011

A Moral Dilemma

On Wednesday night I was invited to a pre-Halloween gathering in the Bronx that very same night. Not wanting to spoil my costume for ACTUAL Halloween I made do with my Swans jumper and socks. Lame, I know - but warm as toast. I also grabbed two bottles of red for $2.99 each and a chocolate cake from the supermarket. When I arrived (Timon was at work btw) I was greeted by a genie looking Sydney and a 'blind' Scott, complete with Robocop glasses. They had prepared a veritable feast of vegetarian delights including vegetable ceviche, brie slices and potato soup. I added my cake to the pile of gingerbread cookies and grabbed my first mojito of the night Also in attendance were the new BX housemates Julie and Liz, Dan from Greenacre and a couple of other girls. Syd's grandma was also there (she's young and sprightly and drank me under the table). The weather was perfect, crisp and cool, perfect for outdoor movie watching. Scott set up the laserdisc projector in the yard and we enjoyed Die Hard whilst eating and drinking and chatting. A Sunshine Cinema alum Albo turned up as a skeleton and I had a nice talk with her. I remember her as being one of the coolest people at that joint (bar Syd and Scott of course) and it's a shame I didn't get to know her better. From what I can tell she's a mega film geek like myself.

At around 9pm Timon and Tim showed up, having spent an hour trying to get free drinks at bars around their work. They came toting a 6-pack of Fosters and joined the party. You must understand, it's a big deal for anyone to make the trek to the Bronx. Especially if they live in Brooklyn and work Downtown. So big ups to Tim for having faith in good times. I need to cut this story short - around 11pm the party was winding up so we headed to the subway. Timon felt a bit queasy but once he hit the fresh air he agreed to catch the train as opposed to a taxi. We left Tim on the downtown 5 platform and jumped on the 2. All was going well until just before our stop at 96th. Timon was looking decidedly green and I asked if he needed something to maybe spew in. I emptied this large, reinforced envelope I was carrying (I collected my mail on the way to the BX) and handed it over. Seconds later, while the train was stalled between stations, Timon made us of the envelope. While I was mortified and turned an instant beet-red I stayed by his side and stroked his back like a good girlfriend. A lovely woman in scrubs offered us some napkins which I grateful accepted. We jumped off at the next stop after what seemed like an eternity and Timon felt better. But he still had that envelope in his hand. Now while the envelope was reinforced and padded it seems, understandably, that it wasn't built to contain stomach fluid. As he was carrying it to the bin, in slow motion, the envelope collapsed, spilling spew all over the platform.

Now here's my moral dilemma. I looked down and walked really fast in the other direction, leaving Timon to sheepishly discard the sopping mess in his hand. It was a knee-jerk reaction. I instantly felt terrible. What if that had been my child!? Is that how I'm going to react when I'm out on the town with a toddler and it spews everywhere? Catchya?? Oh yeah, I also buried my face in my hands. Not very supportive.

But when you think about.....it's Timon who should feel guilty right? Right??

Monday, October 24, 2011

Latte art

To me, latte art is stupid. Mostly because I am completely inept at it. For those who are scratching their head, latte art is that wiggly pattern that comes on your fancy cafe coffee (as opposed to chocolate dust on a cappuccino). It relies on perfectly steamed milk, in both quantity and texture. Then comes the pour. I'm not so bad at the milk steaming - these days I rarely spill it everywhere. It's the pour that gets me. Too fast, too slow, too much wrist - it's a complicated business. I also have no patience for the past time which means I'll never get better. Someone who values the art highly and loves to practice is Timon. And he's pretty damn good. I hear all these tales of double rosettas and hearts and whatever else you can create with crema and foam. I also get to see them because whenever he's up at my store he's wasting my milk on lattes (he also takes photos if for some reason I miss one). I think I possess just the right amount of disdain for something cool that I am rubbish at.

There are a whole lot of people that take latte art seriously. For that matter there are people who compete at National Barista competitions. Last Thursday night Timon and I found ourselves in the East Village, coming off a round of dumplings, looking for entertainment. Timon's friend and workmate Tim texted that there was a latte art comp going down near Union Square - and that he'd be competing. So off we went to Joe's, a regular coffee shop that had closed down for the event. There were free beers and lots of people and a big screen on the wall so we could all see what was going on. The draw was big and many would play off the the championship. The prize? A grinder. And some coffee I think. I could see that Timon was itching to sign up but ultimately found the crowd a little too intimidating. Tim's friend was first up and he went down in a great ball of flame. Tim's other friend went up (he's a National competitor) and trounced his opponent. Finally, Tim's go. The shot was prepared and ready, the milk was steamed. And.......fail. He knew it was over before it began.

That excitement was about all I could bear and I left the boys to their commiserations and beer. I hear the competition was tight and that Tim's other friend dropped out in the penultimate round. It was a fairly ridiculous experience, but all in the name of charity. I can't begrudge that.

Here is a pic of Timon's best efforts:


Sunday, October 23, 2011

Scott's back....finally

I'm writing this a little late because Scott actually re-joined us here in the Big Apple at the very start of October. The first thing I did was enlist him to help me hire a van and drive to IKEA, Brooklyn to collect a sofa bed. I'd had this plan in mind for a while and had stubbornly refused to pay $100 to get it delivered. For three reasons - 1) the sofa bed was only $150 2) it's hard to coordinate days off with random deliveries 3) I don't like to tip big and it's hard to avoid when some guys drag a sofa up 5 flights of stairs.


I spent ages researching van rental places online and decided on some place on W96th. Scott, bringing with him an American drivers license and credit card, met me and we went and signed up. Of course, what seemed like a good deal soon ballooned with the inclusion of all types of insurance add-ons. AND we had to fill the van with gas on return, which is pricey ($4something a gallon). But it was too late to turn back, the adventure was on!! Until 10 minutes later when we realised Scott had been driving in the wrong direction thinking he was about to hit the West Side highway. We hit Central Park. We got back on track and the Google-Map recommended trip of 20 minutes took......an hour and a half. The one thing I do like about car traveling in the city is the view. I'm so used to seeing nothing but the dark insides of the subway tunnels that I forget what the world looks like from a car. We spent about 15 minutes in IKEA selecting the sofa and waiting in line to pay. Scott indulged in their famous hotdogs and we were off, trying not to get lost in the labyrinth that is Brooklyn.

We dropped off the furniture and collected Timon before heading back to the van drop-off place. Which has its own gas station. But if you don't fill up the van personally they charge you an extra $3 a gallon. I thought that was fair until I realised the gas station is literally in their driveway. Lazy buggers. All in all (plus the taxi to Greenacre for recovery margaritas) the sofa-bed cost me about $250. So not really cheaper than delivery. But I felt justified and I had an adventure. Thanks Scott!!

What a handsome devil




Saturday, October 8, 2011

Ziggy

For anyone keeping track - we have a new cat! Poor Rosie was returned to the shelter last Friday. Some would say it was because she pooed on the rug. Others would say it's because her time was up and she was ready for a forever home. Both may be true and Rosie will be missed.

We took the opportunity of a cat-free apartment to do a thorough clean. A full, under the bed, mop the floors for the first time all year clean. With chemicals and everything. After that the loneliness crept back in and Timon was jonesing for another cat. We found ourselves in Union Square on Friday after work and dropped in to Petco just to make inquiries on a new foster. We ended up with Ziggy (nee Rascal), a white cat with a black eye patch. He is quiet and terrified as he's spent all of his rescued life in a cage and the wide open space of our tiny one-bedroom apartment is freaking him out. Please note that we had to change his original name because my family had a cat called Rascal for 12ish years and the pain of recollection was too great. Also, I couldn't think of any good nicknames we didn't use for Rascal 1 so it had to be changed. So far, apart from the sheer terror, he seems to be doing OK. He uses the litter tray (phew) although he did manage to carve a huge gash in it somehow (we buy the disposable aluminium roasting trays because they're big enough for the morbidly obese cats in this country). He has also not made a noise which is lovely. I will post photos as soon as possible but for now, here's this:



Cronenberg, Fassbender and Olsen

Even though I've complained about the pretentiousness of some of these press events, I really cannot complain about the celeb sightings that go with. After A Dangerous Method earlier this week Timon and I were treated to a once-in-a-lifetime eyegasm, Michael Fassbender in the flesh (actually, in leather), up on stage alongside director David Cronenberg. Truth be told I was more excited about Fassbender but after the press conference I was a total convert. Cronenberg was funny, charming and really, really smart. Fassbender was handsome and a little cheeky. But Cronenberg was the star, by far.




I have these mini-moments sometimes when I realise that just one of these experiences would be enough to satisfy our whole trip (for me anyway). But they just keep-a-coming!

After the screening of Martha Marcy May Marlene there was a press conference with the objectionably pretentious director and the gorgeous and surprisingly buxom younger sister of the Olsen twins - Elizabeth. Otherwise known as Lizzie. She's a strange creature, beautiful actress, but every so often her face morphs into her sisters'. Also odd because she is much taller and curvier than those twins. Like human sized.


Crazy lookalike right?


Be careful what you wish for

Life throws you some curveballs sometimes. Now that I'm spending so much time in darkened rooms watching weird films I'm beginning to question my desire for the task. Film reviewer - that's the dream right? The thing is, when you turn something you love into a job, it becomes a JOB. Ew. All of a sudden, instead of putting on pants and walking to the subway to make it to a screening in time, I really just want to stay at home. But then I'm overwhelmed with guilt for being so ungrateful for the opportunity. So I go and wait patiently in the lobby with what are becoming the same old faces of old, obnoxious film critics that loudly extol the virtues of this and the value of that. It's impossible not to eavesdrop partly out of curiosity and the need to validate my own opinion but mostly because I can't hear anything else over the din. One guy announced that all British films should have subtitles for American audiences. British films, as in spoken in the Queen's English. I found out through one of these diatribes that I'm attending these screenings in the company of critic royalty. The problem is, this guy is 75 and seems to have lost his grip on reality. Sure, use your 50+ years of knowledge and experience to inform your criticism, but your opinion doesn't matter all that much if it doesn't consider changing worldviews. Newsflash! It's not really OK to slander ethnic minorities. It's really given me cause to wonder about the nature of reviews and how to frame my judgments. I suppose it depends on who you write for. It's my never-ending battle between the popular and the academic parts of my brain.

BUT - I will continue to give it a chance. I'm trying hard everyday to expand my list of contacts so I can score invites to some of the bigger releases. My soul is suffering a little this week from so many dark arthouse films. I need to go and see Real Steel just to relieve my heavy heart.

Between NYFF and regular screenings this is what I've seen this week:

Blackthorn
Trespass
The Skin I Live In
Martha Marcy May Marlene
Carnage
A Dangerous Method
London Boulevard
Drive

I have My Week with Marilyn tomorrow and Texas Killing Fields (sounds pleasant) and then Comic-Con start son Thursday!!!

Sunday, October 2, 2011

AFL Grand Final night

We watched as Brisbane tumbled hopelessly down the ladder. We watched as the Swans rallied but lost to the Hawks in the semi-final. We watched and prayed that Collingwood and the Eagles would get smashed. One did, one didn't. Timon has read everything written on the AFL season this year and even contributed a player profile to some footy blog he loves. So come Grand Final day we were ready to party. We found a local Aussie pub that would be hosting the game, complete with free meat pies at half time. The place was called The Sunburnt Calf. We invited everyone we know to join us, to celebrate a sport that's near and dear to both of us. Everyone declined. It might have been the 12.30am start time, but more than likely they're just jerks. Ever frugal, we had pre-drinks at our apartment and got good and jolly. We wore our Lions and Swans tees and braved some torrential rain (does it ever stop in this city) in the quest for AFL.

The pub was the same as every sports bar in this town. Narrow, not enough seats and TVs over the bar. Hellish in other words. Luckily, we proved eager enough and the waiter guy got us a table out the back where there was a big projector and screen setup. Lucky again that he was a Geelong supporter so we know we'd be amongst friendlies. I had my concerns that Timon would get into a punch-on with any Collingwood fan so it looked like we were safe.

I have to say, I was really excited. There was something about seeing all the Facebook updates about Grand Final parties in Oz that made me feel closer to everyone at home. It also made me a little homesick later in the night when I was on the downslide of drunkeness. We started a tab (always a mistake) and began enjoying beers and ciders and steak sandwiches and fries. It was mega fun cheering loudly and obnoxiously. Most of the crowd was Australian and most were barracking for Geelong. Collingwood supporters were very quiet indeed. Of course there were moments of tension and a surprising sense of sympathy when I saw the faces of Mick Malthouse and his players. It's amazing and a little bit crazy how serious everyone takes the game. Don't get me wrong, I take it seriously, especially when the Swans are playing, but it's all a little bit silly right?

A funny thing happened - a girl came and sat next to us and introduced herself. She said she was a Sydney supporter but was from Melbourne. Timon introduced us, saying he was from Melbs too and I was from Ballarat. The girl then explained that she was from Buninyong, but always tells people Melbourne because hey, who knows where Buninyong is?! It is one hella small world. She also asked us to take claim of her beer if asked because she was underage!

We made it home in one piece although I don't quite remember how. All I know is that Timon still can't talk and it's 2 days later.

Random moments

*I really miss lamb. I didn't realise how much until T and I met up with his workmate Mark at a bar near their work. The bar was New Zealand themed and I ordered a lamb burger with feta. Lamb is a fairly rare commodity in New York, perhaps because there are so few sheep. But man, would I murder a lamb roast right now.

*I saw an Oscar the other day. I arrived early for a screening at Sony and was chilling in their lounge. I was sitting back in a giant leather armchair, looking out over midtown when I spied a display cabinet. There, all shiny and gold, were 3 Academy Award statuettes, gleaming at me. One was for "From Here to Eternity", one for Eva Marie Saint and I can't remember the last. But what struck me was the tragedy of having these awesome Oscars in the same cabinet as cheap Green Hornet and Bad Teacher merchandise and props. Surely Sony must have produced a few more notable films in the time between From Here to Eternity and Bad Teacher?

*We bought our tickets to Europe in January! FINALLY! Timon is scheduled to fly to Amsterdam on the 2nd Jan, leaving me in New York with my family. I will be flying to Copenhagen on the 7th Jan to help Ida celebrate her 30th birthday. I'm so excited I might bust. From there we will meet up in Germany and farewell Timon's friend Tom and head to Poland. Then we have to make our way to England somehow because we're flying home from London on the 30th Jan. That means we also get to see Freyja and her new dorm room. If only Ross hadn't moved to Abu Dhabi it could have been the trifecta of awesomeness. Good one Ross.

*I went to my first NYFF screening the other day. Luckily I arrived a geeky hour and half early because by 3pm the queue went half way around the block. Apparently every writer and press jerk wants to see the opening film of the festival. I have been surprised at the age of people at these things. I am definitely in the young bracket and I'm nearly 30. It seems that most film reviewers are middle-aged to old men. This screening (Carnage, dir Roman Polanski) was full of white-haired old women. Weird. 

*In lieu of getting tickets to the Arrested Development Panel (which is today btw and I'm very grouchy about it) the PR woman for the New Yorker Festival offered me a ticket to a Beyond 3D panel that was held yesterday. I went along and listened to 4 special effects masters talk about their jobs and various projects they'd been involved in. One guy did Star Wars, Jurassic Park, The Abyss - one did Black Swan and Limitless - one did Avatar, Tintin, Rise of the Planet of the Apes and the last guy did all the Harry Potters. It was interesting to hear their stories although I rarely had any idea about the technology and techniques they were talking about. It's mind boggling. One little kid got up and asked them how they made the spells shoot out of the wands in HP. Aw, bless.




Celebrity Spotting

I have had a pretty full schedule of preview screenings and there are even more to come in October (New York Film Festival and CMJ Film Festival). Timon decided to accompany me to one for Take Shelter a couple of Mondays ago. We got up early and made our way to the Sony Building on Madison Ave. We waited. And waited. Turns out I had taken us to the wrong venue - it was at Magno more than a few streets away and we'd missed the first half an hour. Sad, yes. Serendipitous? Also yes. Because while we were sitting in the grand Sony lobby, waiting on a PR rep that never came, we saw MOLLY MELDRUM. I turned around and saw this giant cowboy hat standing at the front desk and it was none other. Looking way to old to be wearing a tight black tee and fancy bejewelled jeans, Molly was there for an appointment for god knows what. I ogled, Timon laughed and neither of us said anything to him. In hindsight maybe he would have liked being recognised. I didn't want to look unprofessional in front of the PR rep (who was on the other side of town). An opportunity lost, maybe. But still an excellent story.

Following on from that Timon and I found ourselves at the Lincoln Center for the premiere event screening of Guests of the Nation, a silent Irish film from 1935. Lovingly restored by the Irish Film Institute and accompanied by a fancy orchestra, the film was introduced by one of the most famous Irish dudes (not Bono). GABRIEL BYRNE. I should backtrack a little and tell you that we were invited to this event as press and I'm not sure how I convinced T to go. So we watched a couple of modern silent films (2005,2011) that were accompanied by live music and foley artists. Check out my review on Digital Hippos for all the deets. But then, out comes Gabriel Byrne all shaggy haired and handsome. A true silver fox. He ummed and ah'd through the first bit of his intro but then wooed me with his charm and silky, incomprehensible accent. The film itself was a bit tragic but the evening had already attained legendary status in the highlights of my life.

The Usual Suspect

The Archer Variety Hour

On Saturday a couple of weeks ago T and I went to the only place we ever go in Brooklyn - The Bellhouse. If you can cast your mind back, The Bellhouse is where we went to see The Lion King sing-a-long many moons ago. For this particular Saturday we had bought tickets to The Archer Variety Hour, a comedy panel with the stars of the animated series Archer (check it out, it's awesome). It was particularly exciting because the guy who voices Archer himself, H.Jon Benjamin, also voices Bob from Bob's Burgers. Amongst other things. We went out super early to make sure we got a seat and ended up having a few brews at the bar. When the crowds started coming in we jumped on the line and ended up with front row seats. People you may know from the cast include Aisha Tyler (I'm pretty sure she was the only black chick on friends ever), Jessica Walter (the old mum from Arrested Development) and Chris Parnell (30 Rock). Apart from needing to pee the whole time (damn you cider!) I had a brilliant time. The show started with each cast member performing a 'talent'. Tyler's did impressions, Benjamin pretended to play the guitar and Walter and Parnell read creepy ads off Craigslist. You had to be there. Then they all came out and sat and the host (Eugene Mirman, the voice of Gene in Bob's Burgers) asked questions. Aisha Tyler was pretty drunk and hilarious and the whole thing was awesome.

Side note: Lucy told me about an Arrested Development Panel coming up as part of the New Yorker Festival. I sat online for an hour before the tix were available and then got through to a queue and then they were SOLD OUT. Not cool.


Here are some pics: